Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
