I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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