I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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