How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Randomize