are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
