Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
