apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
