FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize
