You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
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