I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize