then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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