Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
