I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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