Heybabeimwearingurpanties
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
