I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
