cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
