Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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