the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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