Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Randomize
