Who did Billy Mays play for?
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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