he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize
