All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
The air taste purple.
Randomize
