Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
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