I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
