she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
love makes seman taste better
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Randomize