We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
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