The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
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