i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Randomize
