I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Randomize
