tonight lets celebrate not being married
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
