This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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