We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize