Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
