I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
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