i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I just cut my nipple shaving
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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