I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
