You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Randomize
