New invention idea: vibrating tampons
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
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