I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Randomize