u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
