I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
