So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
