Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
