i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize