I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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