playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize
