...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
