covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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