He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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