I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
